Another Fail

The National Aquarium was beyond disappointing. And that’s saying a lot because I was high [on life], which usually means either everything seems awesome to me or I see things for what they truly are. Latter. I even saw the dolphin show and the sharks, but I wasn’t impressed, and this is coming from someone who cried on Jaws in Orlando because that mechanical shark looked so real that it scared the shit out of me. The whole point of aquariums, zoos and animal exhibits is that you’re supposed to feel like you’re actually there, immersed in the animals habitat; because, you are. Here, I felt like I was watching a movie about 3 people, who were trapped inside a submarine, continually smacking an old TV, desperately trying to watch their own movie about an aquarium. That probably made no sense, but I stand by my vision. 

The ancient, semi-orbed, protruding tanks were lined with a cloudy film and too thick to see any detail. I thought I saw a fish with no eyes or gills but it was just the crud stuck to the glass that hid the truth. I’m pretty sure they haven’t changed anything, including their over-aged staff since the 70’s. I also found it rather ironic that they had fish on the menu in the cafeteria. Shame on you. I wouldn’t waste another minute or penny to see this ‘attraction.’ Free admission didn’t help whatsoever, and getting yelled at for eating a lollipop didn’t help either.

Overall though, I would like to state that none of that stopped me from being optimistic the entire time and giving every exhibit a fair chance. Sort of like giving a bad porno a chance; maybe fast-forwarding to the end because of impatience, or just feeling bad about yourself for watching too long. Sounds fishy, I know. Whatever, I was convinced I was going to leave with a good finish, but instead I left without even a decent bait.

The video below shows the only cool part I saw, and that was on the escalator, going down; go fis..figure.